It’s time for a change
Sometimes I think the best advice we get comes to us days or even years before we are ready to hear it. In my case the advice came so long ago that I can’t remember where I got it.
“The only thing stopping us from achieving anything, is our propensity to answer every question with “no”, or “why”, instead of with a simple YES.
In ‘09 I was living outside of NYC, working in the photo industry. My marriage hit a brick-wall and we both said, YES to letting it go. That was a limb for me to go out on. My ex said, “go make art, and figure out what you wanted to do next”. (I’d left all my teaching gigs jobs in Philly, to move to be married).
The next big YES. I moved to a small town in the Adirondacks to figure out what and who I really wanted to be. Keene Valley has 200-yr-round residents. I made art, did new things like waitressing and housekeeping. I taught yoga, photo and even taught some people how to train their dogs. But the passion just wasn’t there.
I realized that I had get back to the world-at-large if I wanted more than mountains, a handful of people to talk to, and a crazy-quilt of jobs. I took stock of what I liked about the place, and knew that I needed to trade hiding in the outdoors, for a life in the “real world”. I even made a pro/con spreadsheet to figure it out.
After years of planning and considering possible paths the real change took place within 7 days when I decided to say, YES to one key element and let the rest fall into place.I found my calling as a life coach when several friends pointed out that that was what I’d actually been doing for 90% of my working life. So I said yes, completed my certification and registration through the ICF and embarked on the path that brought me to Asheville.
On the way to Asheville, I took a 4-yr. “overnight” in New Hampshire to expand my coaching business, and teach yoga and meditation for a large hospital system. I also developed a stress-reduction program for layers and found myself flying to NYC to give workshops in glass towers in sparkling midtown Manhattan. It was all amazing business-wise but I had zero life/work balance. So I knew it wasn’t the place for me to land quite yet.
So I go out on another limb, and say YES to a move to Asheville, NC and I have not one whiff of a plan. I rent a house, sight-unseen, in a town and a state I’ve never been to. Held firmly in the belief that everything will work out because I am willing to keep saying, YES.
Time out- One thing you should know…..
9 months after I moved to New Hampshire and started an awesome job as a web developer, (read the blog post) I get laid off. It was a watershed moment. Life was demanding that I make the leap, jump in the water and start swimming as hard as I could for the life I wanted. No more settling for the safe thing or the sure thing. I was going for it!
So my part-time gig became my full-time coaching business. I said YES, trusted my heart, my passion and myself. The way I got from that teeny tiny mountain town to here was by saying, YES to what I really felt was true.
The thing about saying YES is that all your doubts and deepest fears show up for the party.
It’s harder than hiking the tallest mountain and a truer test of one’s-self than anything you can imagine. It is scary and hard and sometimes in the past year I have just sat on my back steps with my arm around my dog and cried from frustration. Just because something is scary and hard, doesn’t mean you shouldn’t do it. In fact,the way you know you’re on the right path is that you meet all kinds of adversity…… and you keep going.
Resilience is about being able to get back up and moving when adversity knocks us off our feet. It’s about having the vision, strength and tools, not just to rebuild our lives, but to redesign them.
It’s about optimal thinking, not optimism. And it’s about being able to take quick and effective reality checks so that we have an accurate gauge of what is happening and where we stand.
I invite you all to join me on a journey for us to build resilience and grow stronger.
Are You Ready To Create An Unstoppable Life?
Amy Kosh is now accepting applications for people ready to co-create An Unstoppable Life with the support of a resilience life coach. If you've come to a crossroads in your life, where the old story is no longer serving you, and you want to find new paths that lead to becoming more resilient, and more you, it may be time for you to find out if life coaching is your best next step.